DOWNLOAD: Harry & The Potters and Uncle Monsterface, "Hamfistin' " (mp3)
Day 10:A trip down Man O’ War Boulevard
Paul: We settle into the Waffle House and Joe and I are still being briefed on all the excitement that took place after we left for the van. Sounds like we really missed out. A crazy emo kid expounded endlessly upon his own personal mathematical theory of life in which zero is the womb, and one is god, and two is life, and five and six are art and music, etc., and if you add his number with his stripper-friend’s birthday and multiply by “the mind,” then you get the number 666. I’m sure it was amazing. Very deep. I should mention that when we walked into the house to get our stuff in the morning, we found this kid sleeping on the kitchen floor. No mattress or anything.
Joe: We’re headed towards Lexington, KY right now. We just finished up the song-a-day for March 10. We’re a little behind. I accidentally deleted one of Paul’s vocal tracks when we were recording last night, so he did it while we were driving. While taking advantage of our mobile studio we missed our exit and tacked on an extra 20 minutes to our trip.
Paul: We just turned right onto Man O’ War Boulevard in Lexington, KY. All men play on 10!
Joe: For some reason, while we’re on tour we always end up eating Mexican food. Like right now. We’re eating Mexican food. I also drink a lot more milkshakes. I hope we get to have milkshakes tonight.
Paul: Tonight we’re playing at a YMCA and I’m psyched because I haven’t showered in like three days. This tour is so rock-n-roll it almost feels cliché. I can’t believe I’m showering at a YMCA.
Marty Allen: We've been lucky enough throughout this tour to often be the only two bands on the bill, but this particular show featured several others, so we were in for the long rock haul. But the place was packed, the other bands nice, and I totally fell in love with the openers, some young blokes called the Generix. They jump, they yell, they have a glowing goose on stage as a mascot, and they sing silly songs that are clearly dear to them -- they are a band after my own heart.
Joe: Petticoat Petticoat is playing and I’m tearing it up on the dance floor. Since the rock music is loud I have my ear plugs in. Whenever I put my earplugs in, I dance way harder than usual. It’s just my killer moves and the Petticoats’ dangerously exciting beats. I am having fun!
Marty Allen: Matt is the ambitious young man who put this particular show together. In addition to doing an amazing job, he set us up with accommodations in his nice home that are in every way the polar opposite of the previous night's. Nice showers, clean beds, a nice mom, amazing food. Lucky Potterface tour.
Joe: We’re out with Matt and some of his friend eating burgers at some late-night eatery. Behold he power of hope! We’re getting milkshakes. Matt just told us that the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup milkshake was the best one they have. It’s too bad I already ordered an Oreo one. I’m debating whether or not to get two.
Paul: They have some pretty cool pinball and video games here, including an insane Ms. Pac Man. It’s like she’s on speed. She’s way faster than the ghosts. I’m cleaning up! I pretty much doubled my all-time high score. It definitely feels like cheating. I think I got up to board eight or nine and broke 60,000. It’s intense! That milkshake is not mixing so well with all the adrenaline.
Joe: Yeah. I don’t think I’m going to get two milkshakes.
Paul: Back at Matt’s house, Joe and I are upstairs talking to Matt in the kitchen. We hear some weird noises coming from the basement. Matt says “It sounds like they found the lightsabers.” Those Uncle Monsterface guys love toys!
From the sockpuppet journal of the Jazzclops: Time is a line, baby. Time. Time time time is a dot. You dig? It is difficult to imagine that which we cannot conceive . . . or else, it is difficult to conceive that which we cannot understand. Right?
Aw, crap, man, I dunno, I'm just talkin' here, y'know? You got a smoke? Right, you stopped smoking to preserve the pipes . . . that's cool, that's cool, kid. Do what you want, you know? You'll be back, baby. They all come back. Heh! No, I dunno . . . Wait a minute. I hear one . . . here we go:
Under the blankets
and over the sea
I would make you things
just for you
Just from meeeee
Skibbee doo bop-puh-puh-puh.
Six boys in a van are there and they are gone. You dig? Like a line and dot
they ain't gone, man. They ain't never gonna be gone.
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