DOWNLOAD, Harry & The Potters and Uncle Monsterface, "Guitar Face Collision" (mp3)
Day three:A visit to the dentist in the form of a vaudville routine; the City of Baltimore lauded loudly; reminiscences of teenage punk bands; of hecklers and Monsterfaces.
Marty Allen: We're pretty sure Joe's tooth is going to be a-okay. They adhered this cool temporary rock and roll wire to it to keep it safe and presumably in place. There is a strong chance he will need a rock and roll root canal upon returning home. It is my guess that this involves flames and bats in place of drills and Novocaine.
Paul: Joe was a real star in the dentist’s chair. When he was done, Joe asked the dentist if he could still sing and the dentist says, “I don’t know, I’ve never heard you.” Then my aunt says, “Then the answer is no.” Our family is great.
Marty Allen: Well Baltimore totally rules. We actually started the day by exercising, which seems misplaced but felt nice, and we logically followed that up with a trip to the wondrous Atomic Comics, a shining gem in the crown of the fair lady Baltimore. And she is fair to be sure. Both Jesse and I agree, Baltimore is the City of the Future. It's streets are paved with candy canes and future rainbow smiles.
Paul: In Baltimore, we stop by Shaun and Leslie’s house. I had called Shaun earlier and asked him to try and dig up some old tapes of the stuff we recorded together when we were 15 years old. I’d just got an acoustic guitar and wanted to start a band, so Shaun and I started playing together under the name Hugh Grant Fan Club. I know a lot of you are younger and maybe you only know Hugh Grant from his recent blockbuster romantic comedies, but 11 years ago he used to star in . . . um . . . romantic comedies. Anyway, at the time, he was dating Elizabeth Hurley (a very beautiful actress) and he got caught with a really horrific prostitute, and somehow managed to keep Elizabeth Hurley from dumping him. I guess we thought that was quite an achievement. Hey, we were 15.
Neither Shaun or I could play guitar or sing, so we just made all these silly, random songs that we sung in falsetto voices. I figured these songs would be terrible, but we listened to a few in the car and they hold up pretty well. James says we sound like early Residents, to which I say, “Yes, that is exactly what we were going for.” Marty talked about his first high school band (Jim Lipkey and the Mimes of Mental Anguish) and said that they had some serious creative differences. He wanted to put Dr. Seuss books to music and the other kids wanted to play Rage Against the Machine covers. Sounds pretty awesome to me.
Marty Allen: The Talking Head is laid out like I'd imagine a tucked away Parisian cafe from the mid 1980s might be -- stout and upwardly sprawling, not at all unlike one of its regulars. Piles of kids rolled on into the joint, and we made with the sweaty and the awesome. And they liked it, too. Well, almost everyone liked it. At one point, someone thought it would be either wise or funny to throw a lemon at me. Perhaps it WAS funny, and made funnier still by my immediate flash of Cthuloid rage shouting ,"Do you motherfuckers want to SEE how we THROW THINGS in BOSTON?!!" It stopped, but the rock didn't.
Jesse: The place is packed. For the first time, it’s suggested that Uncle Monsterface himself stay by the merchandise table while the Potters do their set. He dances, poses for photos, and mingles with members of the crowd, who are warm and ready to embrace him. Uncle Monsterface is very shy but a complete ham as soon as he knows he’s got the floor. He, waves, flirts and dances with anyone who asks. And he really, genuinely likes people in a way that I wish I could.
As the crowds clear out, the Potters meet fans and pose for photos. There's a girl in a “Save Ginny Weasley” t-shirt off by herself, camera in hand, who keeps shyly looking over at Uncle Monsterface. Seeing this with his gigantic orange eyes, he makes his way over and she, bashfully but with great delight, asks for a photo. She hands the camera to a man, likely her father (Potter fans are sometimes young enough to need chaperones). Uncle Monsterface gently takes the camera and, unclear on the point of this, silently but urgently ushers the man and girl together so he can take their photo.
